5:23 am this morning:
*Chris is poking me with his boy bits and nuzzling*
Chris: If you have sex with me I'll make you coffee.
Me: It's 5:23 in the morning. It's inhumane to have sex at this hour.
Chris: It's good coffee.
Me: Go back to Key West.
Chris: I love you.
Me: You'll still love me at 7am, we'll talk then.
Chris: Please, baby.
Me: No.
*more nuzzling*
Me: Are you going to let me sleep?
Chris: After sex.
Me: That coffee better be like fucking nectar from the Gods.
